Hudlin Entertainment Forum

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: Cage on August 18, 2010, 10:18:26 pm

Title: This Time
Post by: Cage on August 18, 2010, 10:18:26 pm
Well my Brethren.  Your boy is about to do it again tomorrow.  After six years of dating, two years of owning a house together and eleven years of friendship we are getting married.  A stark contrast from my last trip down this road.  The first time I ended a three year Law school relationship for the wrong reasons: Race & Religion.  Basically, both of mine were wrong.  Apparently a Black Christian was unacceptable to this particular set of Palestinian/Muslim parents.  To this day I have nothing but warm feelings and love for that woman but not seeing her for thirteen years has softened the blow considerably. I was determined to be with a black Christian woman and that is what I found about a week after it ended.  We dated a month (our first date was at church and we swore the pastor was preaching to us out of Jeremiah: "Build ye houses, take ye wives....") got engaged, then married a year later.  I realized three months before hand that it was a mistake but did it anyway (had I any courage at all I would have called it off).  The great thing about that marriage is my daughter.   I posted here some time ago that it was difficult because of the distance both literally and figuratively, but we have been working on it and she recently spent three weeks with me and we had a great time together. The problem with it is that we built a (figurative) house on a foundation of nothing.  We didn't know each other or even ourselves.  We dated for that month and then spent the next year planning a wedding in two different states (Mass and NC).  So now I turn the page on a new chapter.  My wife to be is Haitian and that presents a new set of experiences and personal growth opportunities.  For example, after the rehearsal events I spent the past few hours with her father who just arrived from  Canada.  He speaks French primarily and is able to communicate with me in English.  I speak no French, no Haitian Creole and nothing of the other two languages he speaks. Yet he is warm and we have a great relationship and hung out just me and him for two hours (and we enjoyed a bottle of Barbancourt together!)  As I mentioned earlier, we are friends and have been for eleven years.  We have built a literal home on the foundation of our friendship, relationship and ups and downs.  I'm not foolish enough to say I know that this is perfect and will be forever.  But I am confident enough to say that we have been planning a marriage for the past six years even when we had no idea that we would still be together.  Its been built on trust, friendship, respect and admiration.  I'm sharing this because I've been a little distant from the forum, but i can't help but feel like this place is like the dining room table.  No matter how long I've been gone I can sit down with my family, break bread, be myself and put my thing down.  So if you are near a drink Thursday the 19th  of August at about 6:00 pm.  Throw one down for your boy, send me some love and a good wish.  Your boy, Cage. 
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Reginald Hudlin on August 18, 2010, 11:32:00 pm
Cage....I am SO HAPPY for you.  It's so wonderful to hear how you have learned from love, whether it go right or wrong.  I pray this is it for you, and a pray even harder that this relationship makes it easier for you to spend time with your daughter.  As a parent myself, any time I hear about children separated from parents, parents who want to be with their parents but are being used a pawns, it hurts me to my soul.
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Magic Wand on August 19, 2010, 02:38:29 am
Congratulations, Cage!

May the Blessings continue to flow!

Love you, Brother!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Curtis Metcalf on August 19, 2010, 05:19:14 am
There is a lot of wisdom in that post, Cage. Thank you for sharing with us.

Here's wishing you continued love and happiness.

I will be having that toast around 6pm in honor of you and your bride:
Meilleurs voeux!
(Et laissez les bon temps rouler!)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: JLI Jesse on August 19, 2010, 08:22:37 am
Congrats buddy!

(http://www.thecomicforums.com/forum2/public/style_emoticons/default/thumbsup_anim.gif)(http://www.thecomicforums.com/forum2/public/style_emoticons/default/zyfingerdance.gif)(http://www.thecomicforums.com/forum2/public/style_emoticons/default/clap2.gif)(http://www.sternfannetwork.com/forum/images/smilies/Animations/dance.gif)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Vic Vega on August 19, 2010, 08:36:07 am
Congrats, Good Luck and God Bless! ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Lion on August 19, 2010, 10:06:34 am
Congratulations, Cage! Wish all the best for you both!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Catch22 on August 19, 2010, 10:24:30 am
Congrats, Cage!!!  I wish you all the best!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Afro Samurai on August 19, 2010, 12:27:54 pm
CONGRATS

Hopefully you can show us the wedding pics  ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Wise Son on August 19, 2010, 03:11:15 pm
Congratulations Cage, that's fantastic news, and I wish you a happy day, and happy years to follow!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Battle on August 20, 2010, 07:09:29 am
That's very good news!   I wish you and your future wife and children nothing but the best!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Cage on September 04, 2010, 11:07:33 am
CONGRATS

Hopefully you can show us the wedding pics  ;D ;D ;D ;D


Thank you all.  We had a great time.  We wanted to have a party and that's just what happened. Our wedding party walked into the reception to "Got to give it up" by Marvin Gaye, we walked in to  "O Fortuna" then did about a minute and a half dance to "You and I" by Stevie, then had everyone willing and able join us in doing her favorite dance the electric slide to "Ain't no stoppin us now" by Luther.  Ain't no Stoppin us Now and "We've only just begun" were our two "theme" songs for our wedding and marriage. After the opening the tone was set to have fun and I think just about everyone did. The pictures are slowly trickling in on facebook and I will try to post a few.

(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs187.ash2/44978_1554784345386_1108504290_31690542_6214071_n.jpg)(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs373.snc4/45618_462046720732_704875732_6951918_2013428_n.jpg)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Reginald Hudlin on September 04, 2010, 11:54:25 am
This makes me SO HAPPY!!!!
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Cage on September 04, 2010, 12:29:28 pm
This makes me SO HAPPY!!!!

Thank you brother.  Your advice some time ago about my daughter really helped me get to this point. I have many more stories but suffice it to say for now that the picture attached to this post features my wife and our daughter on the trolley on their way to the ceremony. During the vows (we prepared our own) the first thing she did was acknowledge her new daughter and quote "I promise to love you as my own, continue to have our special days together and make fun of your dad when he talks to the animals at the zoo."

(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs414.snc4/47698_463470735217_520980217_6898099_625283_n.jpg)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Reginald Hudlin on September 04, 2010, 12:32:57 pm
Aw man, that picture must make you so happy.  I have no idea what I told you but if it resulted in that image, then I'm glad I said it.
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Cage on September 04, 2010, 12:33:08 pm
A couple more:

(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs295.snc4/41111_463466515217_520980217_6897842_7151730_n.jpg)

It was also my Aunt Julia's 85th birthday and we were blessed to share it with her so we got her a cake and everyone came to the dance floor and sang Stevie's version of Happy Birthday.
(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs155.ash2/41111_463466520217_520980217_6897843_473107_n.jpg)

Our first meal as a married couple.

(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs416.snc4/47878_463471040217_520980217_6898109_4010600_n.jpg)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Cage on September 04, 2010, 12:47:02 pm
Aw man, that picture must make you so happy.  I have no idea what I told you but if it resulted in that image, then I'm glad I said it.


In Brief:
I made a post about how there was a literal and figurative great distance between my daughter and I.  You encouraged me to reach out to her as much as possible  and have as much communication even if it seemed insignificant and assured me (even if  didn't believe it) that she would appreciate me being there even if she didn't show it.  At times I even felt like she disdained me, but you and others here (Curt, Sam, Blue and others) encouraged me and told me that my perception was not reality and you were right. 

One funny story, she was recounting the wedding to her mom over the phone and said that her favorite part was that she had a special dance with her dad.  At the time that we were dancing I didn't think she enjoyed it all. But sure enough she loved it.  We danced to Brian McKnight's "love of my life" which has always been my song to her. It came out right around when she was born. Particularly the lyrics "First time I looked into your eyes I saw Heaven."  After a couple of minutes I then yielded so that she could dance with my brothers and nephew. It was really cool.
  (http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs383.snc4/44634_463471630217_520980217_6898128_247810_n.jpg)   (http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc4/hs436.snc4/47928_463471335217_520980217_6898116_3981874_n.jpg)

(http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash2/hs149.ash2/40775_463471635217_520980217_6898129_3337027_n.jpg)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Reginald Hudlin on September 05, 2010, 07:21:31 am
Aw man, the power of HEF.  Glad I was helpful.  Those pictures and that story are the best.
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Kristopher on September 05, 2010, 05:03:30 pm
Hope you don't mind bro, but that redeye on your wife's picture was messing with me. I had to "fix" it.
(http://i554.photobucket.com/albums/jj416/KRStyle/47698_463470735217_520980217_6898099_625283_n.jpg)
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Curtis Metcalf on September 06, 2010, 12:57:40 pm
Cage, that's the best story I've heard in a good while. That's what makes everything worthwhile. I'm so glad HEF has a small role in something that wonderful.

Here's to you brother. By the way, your wife is beautiful and foine. That's an objective fact. Count your blessings.
Title: Re: This Time
Post by: Imaro on September 07, 2010, 01:41:02 pm
Sak passe Cage, Congrats and welcome to the club! From a happily married Haitian Newbie. Y'all look great together; aren't Haitian women awesome  ;)!!!!

If you want some great Haitian/Creole books or history tutorials give me a holla.

God best!

Paul F.