Hudlin Entertainment Forum

How Ya Livin' => Sexuality => Topic started by: Reginald Hudlin on March 11, 2012, 02:01:06 pm

Title: 19 Stupid Lies Weíve Told Dudes Weíve Dated Ė By Frisky
Post by: Reginald Hudlin on March 11, 2012, 02:01:06 pm
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19 Stupid Lies Weíve Told Dudes Weíve Dated Ė By Frisky
by CN on March 10, 2012 with 0 Comments in Chris Please Post , Keepin' It Real
Okay, so sometimes we fib a little bit when weíre dating a guy. Not about the big stuff ó like our name or what we do for a living. Itís not that we mean to be dishonest, itís just that our politeness, insecurity or desire to dazzle get in the way of the truth. And sometimes, before we know it, weíve told you we read all of David Foster Wallaceís books, when really weíve only read all of DFWís book jackets. We meant to read the books in their entirety, we just havenít gotten around to it yet. Anyhow, what weíre trying to say is that weíre sorry for all the stupid lies weíve told. Weíre coming clean after the jump.
Iím totally over my ex. Iím still Facebook stalking him and fantasizing about him sexually on a regular basis, but other than that, heís old news.
I havenít had sex with anyone in a while. Last week is a while, right?
Iím not on anxiety meds. As long as you donít look in my medicine cabinet, Iím not.
I really like bluegrass music. Yeah, I really like to laugh at people who listen to it.
Iím not looking for a relationship. My ass, Iím not. I just didnít want to overwhelm you on our fourth date.
This scar on my thumb? Oh, I once cracked a beer bottle over a guyís head when he grabbed my ass and the glass cut me. Actually, I broke a glass doing dishes and thatís how I cut my hand, but the bar fight story makes me seem like so much more of a badass.
Yeah, I surf. I surfed once.
Youíre the only guy Iím dating. Today.
Iím not wearing any makeup right now. If you donít count primer, foundation, concealer, blush and touch of eyeliner I have on, I am a natural beauty.
Of course Iíve read David Foster Wallace. The Ďol DFW lie never hurt anyone. Itís not like youíre in a book club with him.
I love Jodorowsky movies. See above. This fits into the DFW lie category.
Ethiopian food sounds great. As long as you donít plan on being anywhere near my ass afterwards.
Iíve never cheated. You donít really need to know about the one time I kissed that guy at my sisterís wedding when we just started dating. You just wouldnít get it.
Itís really cute when you use emoticons. I canít think of anything more un-cute.
You have the most amazing d**k in the whole world. This is just standard good manners in bed lie.
Nice car. You drive a souped up El Camino with flame decals? Really?
Itís so sweet that you only listen to Incubus. Maybe ďidioticĒ is a better word choice.
I love your cooking. Yummy! Burnt scrambled eggs and too strong coffee for breakfast again!
Yeah, I had an orgasm. Itís funny how every guy claims to know the difference between a real and a fake one. Bwhahahahaha!