I understand that you don't want to erase blackness from a character. But I'll give an example of what I mean by character first.
Take the show 24, in the original, we have Jack Bauer, a counter terrorist agent and the lead. He is allowed to just be that. Jack Bauer x the badass, the man who gets stuff done, his past haunts him but it's due to an affair with one of his agents, and on a later season he struggles with addiction for when he went undercover. Then take 24 legacy and with Eric Carter, he is a former army ranger which is fine. But then In typical fashion, they have his brother, whom he interacts with quite a bit in the show, as a gang leader. Granted his gang does some good in the show. It still falls back on whenever black characters are involved, their past either has gangbanging, Drug dealing, or incarnation tier to it. All . The. Time. They can't just be a character who was a former army ranger with a family of successful people like White characters. They have to have atleast 1 of the 3 mentioned above.
T'Challa can and should deal with some social issues. I don't mind him having a heart to heart with Luke or Miles about racial issues and how they deal with it in their lives, but I don't want that to be THE defining trait. Like how McGregor had crack show up in Wakanda or Coates rape treehouse nonsense.
Black characters are more than the stereotypes they get forced on them. It's okay if they are like John Wick, Jason Bourne, Master Chief, Neo, and the countless other heroes out there like white characters who aren't defined STRICTLY by their race. They have more depth than that. Show me a Black character that maybe goes back home and sees his community as a familial place, because they exist, where it at gang wars and drug slinging. Show them having a BBQ and everyone getting along, because there is unity in black communities despite what Media wants people to think
I don't think were are seeing things all that differently, however I still believe you ascribe to the thinking/conditioning of race (i.e. Blackness) as being limiting, which is something Generation X was definitely taught when it came to entertainment. My generation got that message all the time. Even the great King of Pop once declared, "I'm not going to live or spend my life being a color" (paraphrasing) in the unsubtly titled song Black or White. I think Blackness can be a way to shape a character and the choices they make, that make them organic and stand out, and not be stereotypical. Stereotyping is a bad, poor, lazy, writing choice that people make because they don't do the work, don't know they need to, or at the end of the day don't really care about these characters; they are just checking a box.
I also keep in mind the context that these characters are created in. For 24, Jack Bauer was created by white people, and far as I know, so was Eric Carter, and so in the white imagination (IMO), they far, far too often can't conceive of a "Black" character without placing them in familiar to them (often stereotypical) trappings. Note as well how many Black characters are athletes or have some Church background or are pastors, if they don't go with criminals. There are also a lot of Black soldiers and police officers too. The one thing, beyond race, that often binds all these characters, is how little character development and promotion they often get compared to white characters.
24 also had the powerful Black Palmer family too, which produced two presidents (albeit neither were that successful, but both were depicted heroically. As was their sister, portrayed by Regina King). And Sherry Palmer was on of the best Lady MacBeth characters I've seen on television, a great villain. And Jack's longtime partner Curtis Manning was a pretty solid Black Best Friend character until he was killed off in a bit of awful, sensationalist writing. If I recall, that was in Season 6, the season which also exposed Bauer's father to be a criminal too; it's just he was not stereotypical, though his crimes were perhaps typical for the kind of series 24 was.
I never watched all of 24: Legacy, and one of the things that rankled was the gang leader brother. I didn't mind the corruption angle. They just could've made him a corrupt politician instead of the gang route.
Black creatives are not above using racial stereotyping either. Though what I think is happening with Black Panther is more of an internal, psychological torment for some struggling over their masculinity, while others might want to impose their feminist beliefs about who black men
really are onto the character. Black Panther just becomes the latest, and one of the highest profile, soapboxes to spread their new (old) religion that N's ain't s**t, even fictional African royal ones.